International Women’s Day 8th March

International Women’s Day 8th March 2024

This women’s day I wanted to highlight two incredible women who are doing incredible work and have a connection to Mellulah.

Firstly, a retreat guest of mine Gowree Hampapur is taking her passion for women’s rights to Mysore in India to support Yoga Stops Traffick with 108 Sun Salutations, please support Gowree by making a donation to her Just Giving page here

Secondly, as Mellulah has had a connection with Morocco and I am about to head out to Morocco to check a yoga retreat venue that I’ll be running in November 2024, I wanted to highlight an award won by an incredible Moroccan mother, Rabha El Mayhar fighting for the rights of her child and recognised by the International Women of Courage Award

My dear friend Amanda McGregor, who will be wit me on the November retreat nr Tagazhout in Morocco edited the film made about Rabha called ‘Bastards’ and available to view via this link  

The charity working with families with children of unmarried mothers, completely unrecognised by Moroccan family laws and ostracised by society, is based just a few miles from our retreat in Agadir, so with all these connections it feels only right to remember the privilege of being a single mother here in the UK and the rights we take for granted.
Supporting other women is dear to my heart as many of you know, so please do take a moment to help raise awareness of Moroccan women and forward this on to others thank you.


Rabha El Haymar – Morocco
“Rabha El Haymar is a courageous Moroccan woman who successfully navigated her country’s legal system and fought to obtain, through a recourse provided by Morocco’s family code reform of 2004, recognition of her traditional marriage to spare her daughter a life of marginalization and discrimination as an undocumented child.  Ms. Haymar’s story became more than a personal triumph when she crossed paths with British film-maker Deborah Perkin and agreed for her story to be told in a documentary entitled “Bastards.”  Shown on Moroccan national television and film festivals around the world, “Bastards” raises awareness about the plight of mothers of undocumented children, and the Moroccan family laws allowing women like Ms. Haymar to seek justice.  Despite the heavy reputational cost of publicly sharing her story, Ms. Haymar believes doing so can encourage other women and lead to change. As King Mohammed VI calls for a new review of Morocco’s family code, Ms. Haymar’s case is now more relevant than ever.  She hopes that new reforms “will protect the rights of all women and children and empower them as full and equal citizens.”

Finally, I was grateful to be featured in Dorset Magazine’s yearly round up of Leading Ladies again this year and hope to continue sharing healing and love to you all again throughout 2024

Much love, Saira xx

Healing the Heart Chakra


Pebble heart at Mellulah

Centring, Opening and Cleansing the Heart Chakra

The heart chakra is an energy centre, the most powerful of all the seven chakras, when we are closed in the heart, we are cutting ourselves off from the rich and everlasting peace, love and harmony that emanates from the universe.

The heart holds Samskaras, from this and previous lives that influence the way we behave, think and react to certain triggers in this life. These Samskaras can be cleared and released to give us more freedom and mental clarity through the practice of yoga.

A Samskara maybe created through a traumatic experience such as a lover betraying you, the death of a parent or child, losing money, health problems, there are many ways that these impressions can be created. There can also be positive Samskaras, from feeling great love, being blessed with a child, a happy marriage, abundance or good health.

What are Samskaras?

Samskaras are impressions left on the heart chakra from past Karmic experiences. We all have them, without them we would not be human, they are natural. Just as a garden always has weeds, the weeds will always come and we will want to uproot them. So we can uproot our Samskras through yoga, a union of body, mind and spirit. It would never be possible to rid ourselves of all Samskaras but we can work with the ones that challenge us most, the ones that keep forming and manifesting into our lives. e.g. if you had a Samskara held from a previous experience where you had been betrayed by a lover, you may keep attracting a similar experience to you so that you can eventually release and heal the blockage in your heart chakra. This can be painful but in the long run it will help you to move more freely through your soul journey.

The memory of why we have a particular Samskara may now be gone, if it has affected us from a past life we would not know the cause. But the impression on our heart is still there.

Samskaras are a part of the cycle of Karma:

> Action (Karma) > Impression (Samskara) > Tendency (Vasana) > Thought pattern ( Vritti) > Action (Karma)>

A Vasana is the effect of a Samskara. These are tendencies, or inclinations that are identifiable as our instinctive and emotional urges,  desires and feelings, whether they be negative or positive.

Vritti are the thought patterns that are created by the Vasana. Our thinking pattens (Vritti) are motivated by our tendencies (Vasana), we think to support our feelings. These Vritti form our patterns, our attitudes and our mental disposition.

Finally our Vritties lead us into action (Karma). We act out Karma because our mind tell us  through our Vritti to act, because that is how we will satisfy our desire (Vasana) which arose from an impression (Samskara) made in the mind from an earlier memory of an action.

So using the example of having a Samskara impression on the heart caused by a previous betrayal:

The wound wound would create a Vasana, an urge or desire to feel jealousy if our partner is close to another in any way, this Vasana would then create Vritti, thought patterns that make us think terrible things, negative thoughts of jealousy, letting the imagination run riot thinking of what could be going on between them, this could then lead to us acting out our Karma by reacting to our partner or the other person negatively. We could have an argument, push them away, get scared and behave badly in some way, end the relationship or seriously damage it, thus creating more Karma with that person and more Samsakara wound in our heart

We have many of the Karmic cycles continuing throughout our lives. According to Patanjali author of the yoga sutras  we must complete 36,000 cycles of creation before we can be released into Moksha, release from the cycle of Karma.

Can we control our Samskaras?

We can not control our past Samskaras because they have been created as a result of our actions, but perhaps we can stop our past Samskaras from controlling us.

The answer is in the practice of yoga which can help us to break the Karmic cycle at the Vritti level, so interrupting the thought patterns that cause us to act in particular ways, thus giving us new Karma and creating new Samskaras or adding to those we already have.

Patanjali defines yoga as this:

*Yoga is the restriction (control) of the fluctuations of consciousness*. So we must try to control our Chittavritti (the monkey mind/mind chatter) the various thoughts of the mind.

Patanjali explains there are 5 types of thoughts in the mind, some painful others painless:

1) thoughts about truth
2) thoughts based on incorrect perception
3) thoughts which have no basis in reality (day dreaming, verbal delusion, talking to oneself in ones mind or vocally and making no sense, having no basis in fact and uncontrolled imagination)
4) dream sleep state of mid
5) memories

By practising the 8 Limbs of Yoga we can attain the highest state of consciousness and be freed from ignorance and egocentricity, which are the cause of ones pain and suffering. One gains complete mastery of the mind and is absolutely no longer controlled by ones Samskaras.

1) Yamas: non violence, truthfulness, non stealing, self restraint, non covetousness
2) Niyamas: cleanliness, contentment, discipline,study, surrender to God
3) Asanas: yoga postures
4) Pranayama: breathing control
5) Pratyahara: sensory withdrawal
6) Dharana: concentration
7) Dhyana: meditation
8) Samdhi: state of ecstasy

By controlling the mind through yoga we can begin to control our Samskaras and release ourselves from cycles of Karma. When we feel the effect of a Samskara we can sit still, meditate and release the energy through our heart centres, this can feel uncomfortable and it is common for us to wish to distract ourselves from this pain. But by allowing it to move through us we can release it once and for all. We need also to refrain from reacting in any way when we are feeling the effects of a Samskara, stay still, sit and move to a place of peace, then decide the best way to deal with a situation or what needs to be said to a person involved, this way we are releasing a Samskara and by staying positive and peaceful we are not creating another.

Forgiveness and Compassion

Firstly, when we begin to understand the cycle of Karma, we can start to forgive ourselves. The cycle of Karma is universal, Divinely guided and destined by God alone. Our Karma is beyond powerful and beyond anything we can control, therefore we can find humility in knowing that our patterns and our behaviours are being caused by blocks in this Karma and not just by our own mistakes and weaknesses in this lifetime.

Forgive yourself and move instead to looking deeply at how to heal your Samskara blocks through the practice of yoga, choose to put time and effort into working at the Vritti level to be more aware and mindful of your thoughts, rather than spending time feeling guilty for your mistakes.

To help us clear the heart chakra further we can bring forgiveness and compassion where it is needed.

A vital part of cleansing the heart chakra is to forgive, this is a beautiful prayer that we will be working with:

Adding the name of the person you wish to work with to the blanks, repeat the first and second part out loud or in your mind for 3 minutes each, then lay down with your hands on your heart and repeat the third for 3 minutes:

1) I forgive ……. for all he/she has done to upset me.
2) I ask and I receive forgiveness for all I have to done to upset ……
3) I forgive myself, I dwell in Light, I dwell in Love.

Repeat daily to instil a sense of peace and compassion in your situation

(Forgiving others is not to allow ourselves to be mistreated. Forgiveness can take time and often there is a process to go through before the point of forgiveness is reached. Acknowledgement of hurt or damage to yourself or others, processing of healthy anger and shadow work, placing of boundaries to ensure we are protecting from others mistreatment of us, work to being self-empowerment to ensure we are acting in healthy ways and surrounding ourselves with kind, empathic people. Forgiveness can not and should not be rushed or forced as it can take away from these vitals stages of healing. Compassion in life is vital, but self compassion comes first)

A chant/mantra of self healing, humility, relaxation, protective grace, ecstatic joy and emotional relief.
Guru Guru Wahe Guru, projects the mind to the Infinite, the source of knowledge and ecstasy.
Guru Ram Das Guru means, the wisdom that comes as a servant of the Infinite this brings us guidance.
Guru Guru Wahe Guru Guru Ram Das Guru

Listen to this beautiful healing chant on youtube xx

First written by Saira in November 2014 

Imbolc Celebration Sound Healing & Gong 1st Feb 2024

Join me for a beautiful way to celebrate Imbolc, the coming of Spring, the very beginning of new growth and the gentle warming of the Earth.

 Thursday 1st February 2024 7-9pm £18pp
Imbolc Celebration Gong Bath with Saira
Moreton Village Hall, Dorset DT2 8RE

“May the stirring of life underground, stir new dreams into life within you.

May the flames of inspiration and new growth be ignited within your Being.”

— Imbolc Blessing

Celebrate the Wheel of the Year turning once again to bring us to Imbolc. Enjoy a blissfully relaxing and deeply healing sound healing immersion with 7 Chakra Singing Crystal Bowls, Tibetan Bowls and the Gong.

Meditations, poetry and chants to help us connect to the traditional ways of ritual and ceremony to honour beautiful point of potential and growth as winter draws to its close.

Here we stand midpoint between Winter Solstice and Spring Equinox, the Light is truly on its way!

Ending the evening with delicious vegan cakes and chai tea. A beautiful way to come together and share space in our amazing Dorset community.

Book This Imbolc Celebration Now 

Save the date! Sunday 24th March 2024 2-5pm for Spring Equinox Yin & Sound Healing with Sarah and Saira! Bookings open soon X


Book This Imbolc Celebration Now 

Awareness & Discernment on the Spiritual Path


Awareness and discernment are vital on a spiritual path. I hope you find my blog on this subject helpful, avoiding spiritual bypassing, magic wand and saviour complex mentalities and more.

I would urge any one on a spiritual path, to be very wary of any teacher or healer, who suggests they have a magic wand that can heal you of all your suffering and remove anything toxic from your life with one simple (but possibly expensive) wave of it!
Spirituality is about our inner work, it is hard, raw and takes time and patience. Healers are facilitators of your own healing, they do not actually ‘do’ the healing for you, they help you to do what you can do very well alone. A healer who is authentic will tell you they can help you fix yourself, not that they can fix you alone.
The ‘saviour’ complex can be dangerous, when a spiritual teacher really believes that they are a saviour of your/our soul and as their own ego becomes more and more inflated and their cheerleaders become more and more in number, their toxic behaviours will also increase.
There are more toxic and abusive people in the spiritual community than we realise. It’s a honeypot for narcissists to get their supply for example, as a narc loves a cheerleader! These people are quite dangerous and its important to do your research, ask around, get to know someones reputation, not just online as an online presence is easy to create as being all about the love, then behind the scenes a persons claims are false and they are detroying people, leaving a wake of broken victims behind them.
If you are sure that you are not trying to bypass your own shadow and spiritual work, if you are sure you are not buying into someones claims to have a magic wand for you, then you will be more discerning in who you choose to allow into your energy and into your soul.
Toxic spiritual teachers and ‘healers’ pray on the vulnerable, making a fortune out of people who are desperate for help. If you are vulnerable, you need to be extra careful you are not being further damaged by someone, who is leading you into spiritual bypassing and the hurt this can create in you long term.
For example – an abused woman who is praying to her angels and paying a healer for a miracle to change her abusive husband and make him be kind to her, actually needs to work on herself to find the strength to get up, pack her bags and leave to find safety, rather than staying trapped in her home hoping that angels, fairies and dragons will make it all be ok.
Find podcasts, books and teacher who can help you break out of the spiritual bypassing bubble that many manipulative, abusive and dangerous people are using for their own ego inflation and bank accounts.
Don’t turn away from spiritual practises either, our journey is a complex one, with a  need for regular review on where we stand, who we have allowed in and where we need better boundaries. A spiritual path is so rich and healings working with the higher realms, angelic kingdoms and spirit guides can be hugely beneficial to our lives and help us greatly, just constant awareness and discernment, continuous reflection and review in order not to get misled or mistreated by the sad fact that, toxic people live in all areas of life.
With love and guidance…GuRu – someone who guides you from dark to light, falsehood to truth, poison to nectar.

Reiki Share Evening in Dorset 8/2/2024


Join Saira for an evening of Reiki Healing!
Thursday 8th February 6.30-9.30pm £15pp
Limited to just 15 people
Evershot, Dorset – address and directions on booking x

We will gather for this reiki share evening in my cosy cottage in Evershot, Dorset. We will share healing together in small groups and then have nice tea and cake, I’ll also share some sound healing with crystal singing bowls for you all too!
I am a Reiki Master Teacher and have been working with energy for over 20 years. I teach workshops to 100’s of students each year and offer courses regularly, Reiki, Third Eye Awakening & Akashic Records.
Click these links to find out more about my spiritual courses and my own spiritual journey

Sign up for £15

Hope to see you soon!

Dealing with a Narcissist in your Life

Special occasions can be the most challenging times when dealing with a narcissist.

If you are living with an abuser, there is no other safe advice to give than to get help, get safe, and try to get away.

But if your toxic person is someone you only have to deal with some of the time, perhaps at work, or a family member, parent, sibling, or a friend you have to see occasionally, learning how to handle a narcissist as best you can is vital to keeping yourself as sane and balanced as possible.

It’s important to educate yourself on what narcissism is and how someone can feed off you as a supply for their toxicity. Narcissists feed off emotional supply and are looking for it whether the emotion they can get from you is positive or negative. They will provoke you to create emotions in you and then feed off the drama they have created. This pattern is vital to learn so you can see what’s called a ‘narcissistic attack’ a mile off and get out of the way as quickly and safely as you possibly can.

Special or big occasion are prime opportunities for a narcissist to get the supply they crave. It’s easy to create drama and chaos in others when we are gathered together, and they can quickly make themselves the center of attention and the center of their own toxic whirlwind. Watch out!

As you get to know and understand narcissism, you will start to recognize an attack from one quite quickly. But as it often comes as a complete shock, right out of the blue when everything is going along nicely for a while, any balanced person will take a while to realize that what’s happening has been created by the narcissist and is definitely no one else’s fault. Once a narcissist has been triggered into their fight response and has become activated, there really is not much anyone can do other than try to get out of the way and limit the harm that could be done.

Remember provoke – emotion – then feeding off the drama is the classic pattern.

  • Recognise you, or those around you, are being provoked.
  • You’ll know its provocation as it won’t make any sense to you, it’ll come out of nowhere, you’ll be utterly confused and when you try to reason, you will just create more activation in the toxic person.
  • A regular person without these traits, would be soothed and calmed by you trying to rationalise, a narcissist will take you trying to soothe and calm them or explain and rationalise with them, as supply and will start to feed off your interaction with them, actually making them a lot worse very quickly.
  • Try ‘grey rocking’. This is a technique that is helpful when dealing with a toxic person that you have to deal with occasionally, or someone who only contacts you via phone, text, email etc.
    • Make yourself as uninteresting as possible, be like a ‘grey rock’ that someone would just walk past without noticing.
    • Don’t react, respond or interact
    • Keep answers short and one word if possible
    • Don’t express any emotion or try to explain yourself
    • Try not to make eye contact
    • As soon as you can, safely leave the room or building to avoid any further drama
    • If you are being contacted by phone, make short, simple excuses as to why you are not available
    • Don’t respond at all if possible
    • Turn your phone off, archive their chat, block them if it gets too much etc
    • Grey rocking is not advised if you are living with a narcissist as its not sustainable over time and can cause you to shut down your emotions and disassociate from what is happening to you, its also not safe to use grey rocking if they are violent towards you, children or animals in your home.
  • Limit the time you spend with toxic people, if you have to visit, make sure its just an hour or two and not overnight or for long weekends. Stay locally and drop in to see relatives or friends rather than having to spend extended time with them.
  • Try to rise above other people around you, who can not see the narcissistic for who they are. They can be used by the narcissistic as ‘flying monkeys’ and ‘enablers’ which can provoke you further, so recognise them as such and limit interactions and avoid getting emotional around them too, as this will feed into the drama that the narcissistic person is trying to create.

For anyone on a spiritual path, an interaction with a narcissist, or their enablers, is rich in deep healing and full of opportunity for your spiritual growth.

It will take all the courage and surrender that you can muster to disengage and not get caught up in a narcissistic whirlwind of provocation and drama, if they start to kick off.

To release the ego enough to know the only and best thing you can do is as little as you possibly can is so challenging. It’s natural when we feel provoked to react; it’s natural when we feel wronged to want to defend ourselves and try to make it right.

Narcissists will go right for the spot that they know will hurt you the deepest. They have no integrity whatsoever and will go to any lengths to discredit you, try to ruin your reputation, and smear your name. They will even discredit themselves sometimes in order to make you look bad. If you can breathe your way through all of that, staying strong and empowered, having courage and holding your own integrity, you are doing some great work.

This is not about allowing yourself to be walked all over; we each have to judge each individual scenario in its own particular way to understand how best to limit the damage a narcissist will try to cause in your life, especially on special occasions.

To recognize that provocation is key to the pattern, you can make the decision to refuse to be provoked, and that takes a lot of strength and deep shadow work to be able to process and let go as quickly as you can, so the damage is limited.

Once again, if a narcissist is violent, aggressive, or causing you harm, if you have a trauma disorder like PTSD or Complex-PTSD, which is very common in survivors of domestic narcissistic abuse, get help, call emergency services, reach out to a friend or neighbour, and for long-term support and recovery, seek help from a trained psychotherapist who specialises in trauma recovery.

Read Sairas blog, Spiritual survival tips for trauma healing here.

Peace xx




December & Solstice Events

Join me for one of these beautiful, heartfelt and soulful events in person in Dorset and online during December and approaching the Winter Solstice.

Friday 1st – Sunday 3rd December
The Conception Plan Retreat at Middle Piccadilly, Dorset

Join me in Sherborne for a unique retreat with ITV’s This Mornings, Dr Larisa, coinciding with the launch of her book ‘The Conception Plan.’ I will be sharing yoga and sound healing alongside guidance on conception and fertility.
Tailored for those on their pregnancy journey, this retreat combines personal healing sessions, tailored nutrition, and meditative circles.

Heavily discounted and limited to a small group who are open to sharing their feedback in this pilot retreat.

Register Your Interest Here

Saturday 9th December 4-10pm GMT (8am-2pm PST)
Activate Your Awakening Online Workshop £33

My Angelic Team are bringing through some incredible energy at this time, this entire workshop has been channeled through them, guiding me to share with you, insights and information as well as powerful exercises, meditations and activations throughout this workshop. I hope you can join me soon!

Book This Awakening Workshop Here 

Tuesday 12th – Thursday 14th December  From £399pp
Middle Piccadilly  Retreat, Sherborne, DT9 5LW
Finding Deep Rest Residential Yoga Retreat

Join us at Middle Piccadilly in one of our remaining rooms for £429. A super simple, deeply healing and spiritual yoga retreat at this long-established and much-loved country retreat centre.

This retreat features Vinyasa and Yin Yoga, Crystal Sound Sessions, and Gong Baths. Nourish your body with plant-based meals and the option for additional treatments.

Book Your Blissful Yoga Retreat Now

Saturday 16th December 2023 10-4pm £88
Winter Solstice Yoga & Sound Healing Retreat Day
Launceston Farm, Blandford, Dorset DT11 8BY

Celebrate this beautiful transitionary time into Winter with us. A real treat for you in amongst  all the busy-ness and chaos. Take a day out for you and leave feeling ready for it all, rejuvenated, restored and full of the sacred space and soul lifting that we will share with you during the extra special day at this gorgeous venue in Dorset.

Book This Solstice Day Retreat Now 

 Thursday 21st December 2023 7-9pm £15pp
Winter Solstice Celebration Gong Bath
Moreton Village Hall, Dorset DT2 8RE


Celebrate the Wheel of the Year turning once again to bring us into the Winter Season. Enjoy a blissfully relaxing and deeply healing sound healing immersion with Crystal Bowl, Tibetan Bowl and the Gong.
Meditations, poetry and chants to help us connect to the traditional ways of ritual and ceremony to honour the darkest night and the shortest day, moving from this point into the Light part of the year.
Ending the evening with delicious vegan cakes and chai tea. A beautiful way to come together and share space in our amazing Dorset community.

Book This Winter Solstice Celebration Now

Hope to see you soon!

See more events for 2024 here

Activate Your Awakening Watch Online


This workshop was held on zoom in December 2023, you can now buy and watch the 4.5 hour workshop via a private youtube link anytime by using the Stripe checkout below. The link will be on the checkout confirmation page and all other instructions are in the youtube link.

Stripe takes you to a checkout via The Light Spa 

Any problems just contact Saira 

Saira has been aware of Angelic Presences in her life since 1998 and has been working with energy healing since 2004. She has felt called to pass on guidance to others, about how to connect and tune in to the subtle energies around us, to our higher selves, our soul. Saira has been teaching Reiki to students for many years and this course would benefit anyone who is already working with the healing modalities, or who wishes to increase their connecting to the Angelic Realms.

  • Seeing through the Veil of Reality
  • Connecting with Spirt & Working with the Akashic Records
  • Practical Guidance to Connect to your Higher Soul
  • Hearing your Angels, Spirit Guides and Light Team
  • Trusting your Intuition
  • Working with Subtle Energies 
  • Awaken your Third Eye Pineal Gland
  • Activate your Awakening Meditation
  • Clearing Past Life Traumas from Previous Incarnations as a Healer
  • Becoming Fully Awakened and Being of Service to Light
  • LOTS of practical exercises, breathwork, activations from my Angelic Team plus Clearing for Past Life Lightworker Wounds plus MORE! 
  • Full Course Recording for you to keep and Full Manual via PDF  

This workshop will be very helpful for anyone working to Clear Karma though the Akashic Records, Past Life Healings and any Energy Healing Work for yourself or with others.

Buy and watch online £33


A shorter 1 hour version of this Awakening Workshop will be a part of the Akashic Record Clearing Training with Adrian Lee in Dorset on 28th October 2023 and online on 18th November 2023, to book those trainings please go direct to Adrians website here


Activate Your Awakening Meditation

Saira works with beautiful Light-beings, Angels and Archangel Metatron, her angelic team will take you through  a powerful several exercises, healings, clearings and an Activation Meditation during this workshop, to ignite your inner Light, activate the Light Codes within your DNA to bring a greater and more abundant connection to you on the day and in the days, weeks and months afterwards.

I thought I would share some of the blog posts I have written over the past few years for you to read if you’d like to know more about my own journey with Awakening over the past 25 years. Its not necessary for the course! But if you would like to get to know me better xxx

Blog posts from 2020 to date:

My Spiritual Journey

A Spiritual Awakening 

The Long Way Around 

Channeled Journals

An Un-Telling of Earth, A New Story 

A Guidebook for the New Aquarian Age – Community

A Guidebook for the New Aquarian Age – Technology

Reaching the Oceanic Consciousness 

Contemplation; A Catalyst for Awakening


Seeing through the Veil of Reality

When it is our time to connect through the veil of this reality and witness first hand, the Divine in action through us, it happens spontaneously and can not be forced. With guidance, wisdom, commitment and release of the egoic mind, we can move closer to the subtle energies around us, connecting through our Third Eye and finding what is naturally given to all of us, but lost for many in our dense, material world.

You do not need to be chosen or special to awaken yourself spiritually, we are all awake if we wish to be, it is just many have lost their connection to their True Self, their Awareness.

If it is your time to fully wake up, as it is for so many on the planet at this time of mass awakening, the guidance in this workshop will help bring that to you in all the magic, wonder and healing that it brings.

Working with Subtle Energies

Saira will share ways to work with past life healing, subtle energy release and tuning in to hear messages from your Angels. Guidance of how to clear negative, unwanted energies from your self, others and your space, home and land. How to see, hear and sense messages, guidance and wisdom from the Light.
How to be discerning about what you are connecting to, working with our own shadow energies within, to ensure we are connecting only to Light and not allowing ourselves to be corrupted as we open up to the spiritual realms.
Trusting yourself is vital if you are to open up fully to the Light, learning to follow your intuition, whilst holding yourself in full awareness is key to flowing freely with the abundant spiritual guidance available to us all on Earth and through the Cosmos.

Awaken your Third Eye

During this workshop, Saira will guide you through practical ways to open up your Spiritual Third Eye Chakra to begin connecting to your intuition, psychic ability, spirt guides and Light-beings.

Your Pineal Gland is the centre of awareness and consciousness within us all, there are many ways we can awaken this hidden, mysterious part of ourselves and you will find out all about this part of you, behind your eyes and will begin to fully connect to the ability to spiritually see, within us all. The Pineal Gland can be ‘calcified’ through many environmental and day to day actions in our lives, knowing what to do and how to reverse this blocking of this mystical connector, will help you find a way to your Higher Self more easily and simply.

Clearing Past Life Traumas from Previous Incarnations as a Healer

Many star seeds who have been sent to Earth at this time to help us transition into the New Aquarian age, are suffering with past life trauma from previous incarnations where they were persecuted, brutalised, killed, tortured, or ridiculed for their healing abilities and energy work. There have been many periods in human history where large numbers of spiritual individuals, groups and communities have been wiped out by political and religious sects.
These energetic imprints of trauma have caused some currently here on Earth, to back away from fully embracing their abilities as he has, many are deeply afraid to come out and act on the awakening that is happening for them, preferring to stay quiet or completely feeling in denial that they are able to connect to the more subtle energies and help others with their healing abilities. This is clearing during the workshop, will help you to feel your password tonight around this area, Helping you to fully embrace yourself as an energy worker and light worker, helping you to fully fulfil your sole purpose here in this life as a Starseed, and fully release all trauma and discomfort around becoming a part of the awakened spiritual, Healing community that is ever growing on our planet at this time.

Being of Service to Light

Making a commitment to being of service to Light is a major step in anyones spiritual journey. We can commit to being a channel to Light and allowing ourselves to be cleared, cleansed and purified of all that stands in the way of us being the greatest channel we can be.
Offering ourselves up wholly and completely is a beautiful experience of deep surrender, trust and faith in the Divine, life can move into a Divine Flow, allowing ourselves to be taken on a blissful journey of self-healing and transformation as we align ourselves in Light and into the Cosmos through all timelines and planes of existence.



Spiritual Survival Tips For Trauma Healing

When life leads you to the truth

Last summer 2022 I found out that I had a trauma disorder called Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD). This knowledge came after a relationship abruptly and shockingly ended, launching a life changing period of deep soul healing and ongoing transformation. Sometimes we must be thrown into the most desperate of circumstances, to discover the truth about who we are and how we got to wherever we are in our lives.

My C-PTSD had come from spending decades in a cycle of toxic and abusive relationships, over and over again. I found a therapist to help me when my year long relationship began to turn into a repeat cycle that I recognised from years of abuse. Having got out of a very toxic long term relationship just a few years previously, I was hyper vigilant and sensitive to the signs of abuse. I had been horribly damaged by trauma and cognitive dissonance caused by repeated gaslighting and confusion. C-PTSD actually affects the chemistry of the brain and my therapist saw that my issues were clearly related to having this trauma disorder. Finding her has slowly but surely changed my life.

C-PTSD is very common in people who have suffered abuse over a long period of time. The abuse causes the trauma and the trauma itself continues the cycle. Trauma attracts trauma.

(If you are currently experiencing C-PTSD scroll to the very bottom of the page for 13 steps to emotional flashback management)

Unhealthy denial & coping strategies

Up until last summer I had managed myself fairly well, considering, and had created a mainly high functioning life. My lovely work has always been a joy; I have a  yoga retreat and therapy business that generates enough to sustain and provide stability for my lone parent family. My three children are amazing and continue to bring me great happiness and pure love. Romantic relationships, however, have been a complete disaster; some might say carnage….

C-PTSD survivors commonly struggle with boundaries, are chronic people pleasers, co-dependents, and fawners who struggle with reading others’ intentions or motives. We typically ignore red flags, we make excuses for others rather than expecting accountability. We allow ourselves to be treated horrendously until one day it gets so bad that we have no choice but to wake up, take responsibility and begin the journey to getting well and finding our inner source of power within.

My life earthquake

I call what happened last Summer Solstice 2022 my ‘Life Earthquake’. It came and shook me to the core and as everything around me and inside of me crumbled, I was left to search the rubble and find out why. I needed to take full responsibility for the shattered mess that my life had become. There was no rescue team coming, this was up to me and as I went into trauma regression, another strong part within me was determined that this had to stop.

My relationship ended abruptly and without warning. I was ghosted.  This came a few weeks before we were being evicted and moving in together, to a house I couldn’t afford on my own.

The shock was profound and took months to recover from. Last summer, after he got out of my car and walked off in the rain at the beach, I sat there for over an hour, staring at the sea through the rain covered windscreen. Unsure about what had just happened, stunned about how I’d just been treated by the man I had been convinced really did care about me. I was unable to think, move or even pick up my phone to call a friend for help. This was the beginning of the shock and devastation that would last for months.

A bravery came over me for a day or two, a resolve that I wasn’t going to let myself be treated badly again. Little did I know those first few days of courage would not last and I was about to nosedive into a four-month C-PTSD regression.

(A trauma regression is an extended period of the intense emotional flashbacks that characterise C-PTSD)

The reality of regression

During that time I managed to work but had to significantly cut back. Teaching yoga has always been a channelling of energetic source for me; a ‘space’ I go into, a place to access a higher source for my clients and yogis no matter what is occurring in my personal life. Thankfully, this continued to be the case throughout this traumatic healing time, and many people have commented on how surprised they were to learn what I was going through, as I continued to work, heal, and share. I call it love!

We were moving house in August and the shock was so enormous; it was such a struggle to get my head straight. I didn’t go into town once in that time, I didn’t step foot in a cafe, pub, or supermarket. I remember going into a shop with my daughter and having to leave and go back to the car. The C-PTSD symptoms made me agoraphobic for a long time.

As the trauma symptoms continued, so did the trauma triggers. For months the shocks and events surrounding this horrific break up continued. It was clear that my trauma was attracting trauma and would continue to do so until it was healed.

My ex used many classic abusive tactics as well as ‘stonewalling’ and ‘ghosting’, also called the ‘silent treatment’, after abandoning us.

During the last weeks of the relationship he’d ‘gaslighted’ and ‘manipulated’ me into believing his behavior was my fault. He’d raged, screamed and shouted at me and I’d struggled to comprehend what was happening,  looking back I can see how the shock of that mask falling off, affected me so badly.

Once he’d disappeared, (known as a ‘discard’ when you are no longer useful to an abusive person). He embarked on a ‘smear campaign’ to one of my closest friends at the time, he used his own ‘flying monkeys’ to abuse me further with cruel texts and he left me with 20K debt as I tried to salvage the plan to move into our rented home with my children. After 2 years of searching for a home, after being given our eviction notice in 2020, I was left with very little choice.

For months I didn’t share with any of my clients or yogis what had happened. I avoided some really good friends and my amazing reflexologist until November because I just couldn’t find the words to tell them what had happened. I knew they would also struggle with the news.

Adrenaline was pumping through my body continuously, I found various ways to lighten this, and I list them below for you. For those first four months, June to October, I was in a permanent state of extreme trauma which I can only describe as wanting to climb out of my body and get away from it. I did venture out to a lovely yoga event in September, but cried every time I saw anyone I knew, until a dear friend took me aside, sat me under a big willow tree hidden from the crowds, and let me cry until we transmuted it into laughter in the rain.

Just as I thought I was really getting better, in early 2023 I regressed into an intense six weeks of C-PTSD symptoms; I couldn’t be alone at night, my trauma responses became overwhelming. Friends and family were amazing and helped me cope, coming to stay in my cottage or putting me up for the night.

I’d been ignoring these feelings of despair for years, allowing myself to be treated so badly for so long. I’d never talked about it, not even to friends, hiding what was happening, pretending all was fine, making excuses to my children and myself. I’d allowed shame, guilt, and self-blame to build so profoundly that I’d locked myself out of my own heart and refused to feel the pain.

Until that day at the beach when he got out of the car, when I had to move a few weeks later with no explanation or understanding about where he’d gone, when it got so bad it was impossible to excuse. He was just another ‘he’, another version of the same man who had been abandoning, betraying, smearing, and abusing me for decades.

I realised it wasn’t about him per se, it was about life giving me exactly what I needed, to ensure I woke up and faced it all. This was now or never.

C-PTSD – My way out, not a way to stay stuck

I believe I am a very lucky person. I have beautiful, solid friends who I’ve known for decades, who have seen me through many ups and downs, and I feel incredibly loved. I have a supportive, kind family and parents who are always there for me.

For seven months after he left, not one day went by without someone getting in touch to ask how I was doing. I had a support team around me constantly checking in, who felt like a rock supporting me.

The fact that I am here today; healthy and well, writing this, is proof of how beautiful life can be and how privileged and grateful I am to be living it. If there is one thing I am certain of it is that I have no reason to feel sorry for myself. I am not a victim.

Finding out I had a trauma disorder was not a ‘get out free’ card for me. It wasn’t a way to give in and make excuses for poor choices and horrendous mistakes. There was no part of me that wanted to move on and declare to future partners that I had an issue, that I had no part in my behaviour. I wasn’t going to play the ‘poor me I’ve had an awful time, I can’t help it’ game, ever.

For me, finding out I had C-PTSD was a gateway to deeper healing. This was what I needed to better understand myself; to research, read, find experts, and commit to therapy. This was a way out for me, I was going to move forwards with this, not give up or stay stuck.

C-PTSD is not something I have, it is something I am recovering from, something I am healing from by doing the work. My true intention is to get to a place in the future where I do not suffer with C-PTSD, it is not something I intend to carry forward with me. It is my healer, not my truth.

It is my way out, not my way to stay stuck.

Tips to get through a day of C-PTSD

Last summer I had some wonderful, wise souls who helped and guided me, including my life-changing therapist.

One day at a time, one breath at a time….

Here is a list of a few practices that helped me in those early days, as I dealt with the shock of the breakup, packing up boxes and making huge decisions about finances and whether to move to our new cottage, or into storage. I am so grateful to everyone who helped me and stayed with me through that time, their guidance and wisdom was invaluable.

Gather your good friends close – those who never judge you, who love you to pieces no matter what state you are in.

• Be prepared to retreat – hide and stay away from people, places and things that trigger you. This is about healing, not about keeping up appearances. If you need to go AWOL for a while those who care will still be there for you when you are ready.

• Cold water therapy – I have been swimming all year since last April and it has been a huge part of my healing. Sea swimming in December/January in the UK has been the most euphoric and deeply healing experience ever for me. It lifted me out of trauma over and over again last year and continues to be a huge part of my life now. I can’t tell you how good this will be for you!

Dance – make a playlist of 3 songs, at least one really upbeat tune, maybe a dance/old school rave track. Set an alarm on your phone each day to remind you to dance. Stop whatever you are doing, shut the curtains, put on headphones and let it out, even if you end up in a heap on the floor, DANCE! Here is mine on Spotify

Shake – shaking is a well-known way of releasing trauma from the body, do it once a day at least. You may not feel like doing anything as structured as yoga when your CPTSD is really bad, so shaking is a way to transmute the negative energy.

Find a really amazing therapistInternal Family Systems (IFS) is amazing and totally unlike regular counselling. Think Shamanic- Meditation-Talking therapy combined. Not all IFS therapists are trained Psychotherapists so think about what your needs are, I wasn’t comfortable with working with anyone who hadn’t had full training. Check the IFS directory and find someone that resonates for you

Read Pete Walkers book C-PTSD, From Surviving to Thriving – his tools for emotional flashback management and understanding of the trauma spectrum ‘Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn’ is invaluable and life changing.

Energy Healing – this is my work and my soul purpose here in this life, so I am lucky to know some incredible healers from around the world. Here is my top list of amazing healers (all work on online) who helped me through this journey:

Adrian Lee – amazing Akashic Record Clearing, soul contracts, past lives…think miraculous! So glad I met this man!! The link will take you to his website.

Corley Magnusson – beautiful rich healing energy and deeply wise guidance, Corley was with me all the way last year, I am not sure I could have done it without her support x email her at

Ho’oponopono – a Hawaiian practice for self-forgiveness, recognising the pain we cause ourselves by reliving traumatic memories over again and offering love, forgiveness, apology, and gratitude to the divine light within that wishes us to move forwards and feel well.

Body work- massage & reflexology – your body needs to support to get itself back to balance. Body work will help to shift toxins that become stuck when you are flooded with adrenaline. You need help to regulate your nervous system which is completely knocked out.  My reflexologist who I am hugely grateful for Annabelle Turner based in Dorset

Tinctures & Supplements – the adrenaline flood that comes with C-PTSD means you need to antidote.

Vitamins are vital especially C, B and Omega oils.

• To sleep take Valerian tincture.

CBD oil is amazing (I ended up having to take the more hardcore THC oil for a few months just to be able to rest for a few hours at night and anything is better than pharmaceuticals sleeping pills).

Rescue remedy and Bach flower remedies Mimulus, Aspen and others suitable for your specific needs.

Guided meditation & Yoga Nidra – it’s impossible to silence the mind when your symptoms are intense which means silent meditation could be re-triggering. YouTube is full of lovely trauma-sensitive meditations and distant healings that will support you.

Nature & Prayer- trees are so healing and magnificent views are transformative. Sometimes all there is to do is get down and pray to the Divine for release and guidance.

Sacred Sites – I love to sit in ancient churches, standing stones and energy portal sites, reminding us of our pasts and our ancestors.

There is much more, and I will share in another blog soon. My recovery journey is ongoing. I came out of the intense regression last October and continue to feel the healing lifting me further up and out every day.

Exploring the Dark to be of service to all

If you are a Lightworker, a Starseed, you are likely here to learn and evolve so that you can be of greater service to humanity. I believe that I have had these dark, challenging experiences in my life to learn from experience, so that I can truly and authentically know how to help others.

Some of us are not just Lightworkers, but LightDarkworkers; we came to work with Darkness too. I went into the darkest of places last year, I saw and sensed energy unlike anything in my life before – and I’ve been working with energy for over 20 years. I believe nothing happens to us that we can’t handle, so long as we stay strong and courageous.  I feel certain that what I faced and overcame has given me a true and authentic ability to understand the uncomfortable and unspoken energy of darkness, that humanity is being released from at this time on our planet.

I believe I have been ‘exploring’ dark energy in my life as part of my soul’s evolution. It can’t always be pretty and fluffy! I am sure that what I have been through has been an ‘initiation’ of some kind, a sacred rite to take the Heroes Journey within and discover my true self.

Since finding the courage to accept and flow with this journey, my energy healing has become dramatically more abundant. I am having incredible results with my clients and channelling a beautiful Light energy that is helping people in many profound ways. Clearing out and detoxing from the shadow and unprocessed parts of my soul have created a way-in for a beautiful new energetic flow of Light. I hope to be of greater service to the Divine and to humanity and help others heal.

Facing darkness I found Light, I found truth, and I found healing. I will never be afraid of the darkness again because it has been my healer and I am eternally grateful for it.

Divine Guidance

I had a dream last summer, in fact it was a nightmare. I was in my house and in every room I went into there was another shock, something jumped out from behind a door or from under the bed, it was terrifying. Amidst the fear there was a kind, Angelic voice that said, ‘We had to get you to here’. I woke up instantly understanding what those words meant. I had spent years limping through life trying to hold it all together; bringing up my children alone, dealing with ex’s and toxic relationships, aggressive men, abuse and trauma. Things had to get so bad that I couldn’t ignore it anymore; I had to nearly be homeless, nearly lose everything, nearly lose my mind, nearly not make it, before I finally made a decision to face it all and take full responsibility for allowing these situations and people into my life for so long.

The search party and rescue team never did arrive, but I found my own and continue to work with my own inner rescue warriors day by day as I heal. I hope you find yours too.

Love Saira xxx

For anyone currently suffering with Complex-PTSD symptoms I recommend seeking help from a trained Psychotherapist. This Flashback Management help guide from Pete Walker was invaluable to me during my 4 month intense regression last summer and I add it here as it might help you today:

13 STEPS FOR MANAGING FLASHBACKS [Focus on Bold Print when flashback is active] Pete Walker, MFT [925 283 4575]

  1. Say to yourself: “I am having a flashback”. Flashbacks take us into a timeless part of the psyche that feels as helpless, hopeless and surrounded by danger as we were in childhood. The feelings and sensations you are experiencing are past memories that cannot hurt you now.
  2. Remind yourself: “I feel afraid but I am not in danger! I am safe now, here in the present.” Remember you are now in the safety of the present, far from the danger of the past.
  3. Own your right/need to have boundaries. Remind yourself that you do not have to allow anyone to mistreat you; you are free to leave dangerous situations and protest unfair behavior.
  4. Speak reassuringly to the Inner Child. The child needs to know that you love her unconditionally– that she can come to you for comfort and protection when she feels lost and scared.
  5. Deconstruct eternity thinking: in childhood, fear and abandonment felt endless – a safer future was unimaginable. Remember the flashback will pass as it has many times before.
  6. Remind yourself that you are in an adult body with allies, skills and resources to protect you that you never had as a child. [Feeling small and little is a sure sign of a flashback]
  7. Ease back into your body. Fear launches us into ‘heady’ worrying, or numbing and spacing out. [a] Gently ask your body to Relax: feel each of your major muscle groups and softly encourage them to relax. [Tightened musculature sends unnecessary danger signals to the brain]
    [b] Breathe deeply and slowly. [Holding the breath also signals danger].
    [c] Slow down: rushing presses the psyche’s panic button.
    [d] Find a safe place to unwind and soothe yourself: wrap yourself in a blanket, hold a stuffed animal, lie down in a closet or a bath, take a nap.
    [e] Feel the fear in your body without reacting to it. Fear is just an energy in your body that cannot hurt you if you do not run from it or react self-destructively to it.
  8. Resist the Inner Critic’s Drasticizing and Catastrophizing:
    [a] Use thought-stopping to halt its endless exaggeration of danger and constant planning to control the uncontrollable. Refuse to shame, hate or abandon yourself. Channel the anger of self-attack into saying NO to unfair self- criticism.
    [b] Use thought-substitution to replace negative thinking with a memorized list of your qualities and accomplishments
  9. Allow yourself to grieve. Flashbacks are opportunities to release old, unexpressed feelings of fear, hurt, and abandonment, and to validate – and then soothe – the child’s past experience of helplessness and hopelessness. Healthy grieving can turn our tears into self-compassion and our anger into self-protection.
  10. Cultivate safe relationships and seek support. Take time alone when you need it, but don’t let shame isolate you. Feeling shame doesn’t mean you are shameful. Educate your intimates about flashbacks and ask them to help you talk and feel your way through them.
  11. Learn to identify the types of triggers that lead to flashbacks. Avoid unsafe people, places, activities and triggering mental processes. Practice preventive maintenance with these steps when triggering situations are unavoidable.
  12. Figure out what you are flashing back to. Flashbacks are opportunities to discover, validate and heal our wounds from past abuse and abandonment. They also point to our still unmet developmental needs and can provide motivation to get them met.
  13. Be patient with a slow recovery process: it takes time in the present to become un- adrenalized, and considerable time in the future to gradually decrease the intensity, duration and frequency of flashbacks. Real recovery is a gradually progressive process [often two steps forward, one step back], not an attained salvation fantasy. Don’t beat yourself up for having a flashback.



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